Minnesota Prairie Roots

IF YOU HOSTED a party and offered five types of pop and bottled water to your guests on an 89-degree day, which would be the top pick?

What if you threw beer and wine into the mix?

A non-government researcher, in an unscientific study conducted Saturday in Faribault, Minnesota, discovered what the general public, or at least the beer-drinking public, has long known. On a hot day, nothing quite quenches thirst like an icy cold beer.

Now scientists have evidence to back up that long-held theory.

The unidentified civilian researcher reported that he sorted and counted all of the empty beer and soda cans and plastic water bottles following a college graduation party at his home Saturday.

“I didn’t think they (party guests) drank that much beer,” he states in an unofficial report released today by the consumer watchdog group Beverage Counters of America, tasked with analyzing beverage consumption in the Midwest. The researcher stresses that party attendees were drinking responsibly and had designated drivers.

Because the study was limited to three selected beers—Grain Belt, Michelob Golden Draft and Michelob Golden Draft Light—BCA officials warn the results are inconclusive and cannot be applied to the general population.

Beer drinkers at the Faribault research party consumed 14 cans of Michelob Golden Draft Light, the BCA report states. But a source, speaking on condition of anonymity, reveals that those numbers are likely tainted.

Party-goers apparently smuggled their favorite brands, including two cans of Michelob Light, into the unsecured pilot test site in an attempt to skew results. Four empty cans of Coors Light, known to be the beer of choice for at least one guest, were also discovered during the can count.

Grain Belt, long a Minnesota-brewed favorite, ranked second among beer drinkers with 12 cans of the beer consumed at the Faribault test site.

Eight cans of Michelob Golden Draft were also consumed, although researchers are apparently questioning the validity of those findings. An unauthorized woman assisting with the research says she discovered an empty Michelob Draft can tossed into a bird bath and another thrown into a bed of ferns at the test site. The BCA speculates this may have been a covert attempt to sabotage the results.

Consumers at the test site chose from these non-alcoholic beverages.

IN REVIEWING POP CONSUMPTION, the researcher found Fresca to be the top soda selected by party guests 10 times. They were also offered Ruby Red Squirt, Mug root beer, Dr. Pepper and Coke.

Total can counts showed that nine cans each of Squirt and root beer were drunk and four cans each of Dr. Pepper and Coke.

Research specialists evaluating the soda can count data say they are focusing now on whether can colors impacted selection. They note that three of the cans are red, but that the top choice, Fresca, is packaged in a blue-green can. Scientists hypothesize that the brain may be predisposed to selecting a cool color during hot weather like that experienced Saturday at the Minnesota test site.

The BCA report concludes that bottled water consumption in the pilot project equaled that of Fresca with 10 empty water bottles counted.

There were no empty wine bottles.

After receiving funding through the government program Cash for Beer Cans, the BCA now moves into the next phase of its research—expanding its test area and uncovering why icy cold beer is more thirst-quenching than pop on a hot day.

© Copyright 2010 Audrey Kletscher Helbling