Minnesota Prairie Roots

Writing and photography by Audrey Kletscher Helbling

In a Minnesota cemetery: Oh, sweet baby, who were you? June 16, 2016

 

Emmanuel Cemetery, Aspelund 169 baby grave marker

 

I’VE TOURED MANY RURAL CEMETERIES. But never have I seen a grave marker that so saddened me as the one I spotted on the edge of the Emmanuel Lutheran Church Cemetery in Aspelund on Sunday afternoon.

 

Emmanuel Cemetery, Aspelund, 172 baby grave & flip flop

 

Smaller than the length of my size eight flip flop, the simple slab of concrete tilted barely above the earth. Inscribed thereon, in cursive, was a single word—Baby.

 

Emmanuel Cemetery, Aspelund 170 baby grave marker close-up

 

Certainly I’ve seen grave markers of many babies. But this one, because of its minimal size and placement under trees along the cemetery boundary and its simplicity of design, caused me to pause. I am a mother and a new grandmother. And I suppose in the humanity of that, thinking of my own love for my daughters, son and granddaughter, I empathized with the grief of such a loss.

A section of the cemetery that lies next to Emmanuel Lutheran Church and next to a field.

A section of the cemetery that lies next to Emmanuel Lutheran Church and a field.

Aged tombstones, which I assume once stood vertically, are now cemented flat into the ground.

Aged tombstones, which I assume once stood vertically, are now cemented flat into the ground.

The names reflect the ethnicity of the immigrant families who settled in the Aspelund area.

The names reflect the ethnicity of the immigrant families who settled in the Aspelund area.

Dates are missing from the in-ground marker of Hans, whom I believe to be an early immigrant.

Dates are missing from the in-ground marker of Hans, whom I believe to be an early immigrant.

A beautiful sheltered gravesite

A beautiful sheltered gravesite for John and Maren.

Love the immigrant names of Johannes and Engeborg. So poetic.

Love the immigrant names of Johannes and Engeborg. So poetic.

As I further explored the cemetery—reading the Scandinavian names, studying tombstones and admiring the meticulously kept grounds—I couldn’t shake the image of that baby’s gravestone. Who was he/she? Who were the parents? Why did he/she die?

Next to this list of rules is a graveyard directory, which we couldn't decipher.

Next to this list of rules is a graveyard directory, which we couldn’t decipher.

Hoping to find answers on a posted cemetery directory, neither my husband or I could figure out how to match names with platted marker locations. So I left, still wondering about this precious baby buried here beneath trees in rural Goodhue County, Minnesota.

© Copyright 2016 Audrey Kletscher Helbling

 

A grandfather’s love April 20, 2016

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My granddaughter at 10 days old.

My granddaughter at 10 days old.

THERE IS A SIDE TO GRANDPARENTING I never considered. And that is the joy of watching my husband in the role of grandpa. Randy holds his little Isabelle with such gentleness, cradling her in his arms like the precious baby girl she is to all of us.

Grandfather and granddaughter.

Grandfather and granddaughter.

He is a man who works with his hands—pounding, fixing, drilling—as an automotive machinist. Oil and grease stain his skin and rim his fingernails. He works hard. But those same strong, rough hands wrap a swaddle cloth around Izzy and tuck in her bare feet as he gazes at her with such tenderness that my heart aches.

Two generations connecting.

Two generations connecting.

And then at one point, this 10-day-old baby reflexively wraps her tiny hand around her grandpa’s right thumb. A kiss before she can kiss him. Love so sweet, so beautiful, between a grandfather and his newborn granddaughter.

© Copyright 2016 Audrey Kletscher Helbling

 

Meet my beautiful granddaughter April 8, 2016

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My new granddaughter, Isabelle ("Izzy" for short) Karis. Photographed when she was about 17 hours old.

My new granddaughter, Isabelle (“Izzy” for short) Karis, photographed when she was about 17 hours old.

SHE’S HERE. She’s beautiful. And she’s my first grandbaby, Isabelle Karis.

Born 19 days early late Wednesday afternoon, Isabelle weighed 6 lbs., 15 oz., and measured 20.5 inches. It is a joy to finally meet this little girl I’ve been loving since I learned in September of her forthcoming birth. I am thrilled to be part of what numerous well-wishers term The Grandparent Club.

Isabelle is named after her paternal great great grandmother, also her Oma’s middle name. Her middle name, Karis, is the Greek word for “grace.” So fitting. So lovely.

I felt that grace Thursday morning as my husband and I stood with our son-in-law at Amber’s bedside, baby Isabelle cradled in her arms, the hospital spiritual advisor also there. As Marc prayed a blessing upon his daughter, our hands hovering over her, tears leaked down my cheeks. It was a profound moment for me as I was overwhelmed by emotion. Relief. Thankfulness. Awed by the miracle of life. So in love with this little girl.

© Copyright 2016 Audrey Kletscher Helbling

 

His humor March 15, 2016

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MY HUSBAND POSSESSES a distinct sense of humor. It’s not an I am funny, ha, ha, listen to me type of joke-telling humor. Rather, it’s understated, punching into conversation when least expected. Humor is one of the qualities I really appreciate in him.

Randy makes me laugh when I need laughter. He makes me smile when I need a smile. His humor balances my serious personality.

He reads the comics. I don’t. Sometimes he clips a comic from the paper and sticks it on the fridge, just for me. He doesn’t tell me. He waits for me to notice. And when I do, I laugh at the appropriateness of the joke. And then I smile because he was thoughtful enough to think of me while reading the funnies.

You gotta love a guy like this.

When it comes to greeting cards, he likes funny. I like poetic and romantic and serious. He chooses cards for the guys in the family. You know, cards about beer and growing old with a humorous twist. Sometimes I nix his choices or add a personal note, Randy chose this card.

When he was tasked to design a onesie for our soon-to-be-born granddaughter, he presented an idea. I had to reject it given our daughter would never put the shirt on her daughter. But then he came up with another idea and set to work stenciling an owl and printing accompanying words. His design is a perfect example of his humor:

 

Nocturnal creature onesie, 3

 

Fitting for a newborn, wouldn’t you say?

© Copyright 2016 Audrey Kletscher Helbling

 

Personalizing a baby shower by painting onesies March 9, 2016

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HERS WAS A NOVEL IDEA. At least to me. But apparently not in the current trend of baby shower activities.

Three of the onesies painted at the baby shower I hosted.

Three of the onesies painted at the baby shower I hosted.

When my daughter Miranda suggested painting onesies at her sister and brother-in-law’s baby shower last Saturday, I jumped on board. This hands-on project would allow guests to express their love for the parents-to-be and their baby girl in a creative and practical way.

Art supplies for painting onesies.

Art supplies for painting onesies. The Scribbles brand 3D fabric paint pens were purchased at Hobby Lobby as were the foam stamps.

Miranda purchased the supplies—onesies in various sizes (which she pre-washed), fabric paint in tubes, brushes and foam stamps. I set up the painting station in our basement, complete with a canvas drop cloth covering our newly carpeted floor. Accidents happen. I saved scrap cardboard to slide inside onesies and provided Sharpies.  The paternal grandma added animal stencils to the creative possibilities.

An appropriate design for a March baby shower.

An appropriate design for a March baby shower.

My biggest dilemma was deciding when to schedule this activity during the baby shower. After lunch seemed best. I needed time to clear dishes and store away food before games and gift opening. Unfortunately I had to relocate several guests back upstairs to finish their meals so the painting could begin.

My daughter Miranda, project coordinator, sits at the end of the table.

My daughter Miranda, project coordinator, sits at the end of the table.

When time allowed, I headed to the basement with my camera, observed and documented. The results impressed me.

A niece created the ocean themed onesie on the left.

My niece created the ocean themed onesie on the left. Another niece designed the “little stinker” shirt and Miranda created the zoo animal design.

I didn’t follow the design phase, with the exception of one. A niece was planning an ocean theme, a tribute to the dad-to-be who is originally from California. She was a bit dismayed to learn that Marc grew up, not near the ocean, but in the desert. Still, I encouraged her to go with sunny ocean-side. She did.

My creation: Ewe (you) are my sunshine.

My creation: Ewe (you) are my sunshine!

Because I was busy with hostess duties during the shower, I didn’t paint a onesie until days later. That gave me time to think of an idea without party pressure.

I crafted this design for Baby Girl from her Uncle Caleb, a student at Tufts University.

I crafted this design for Baby Girl from her Uncle Caleb, a student at Tufts University.

I also created a personalized shirt from my son by stenciling a blue elephant. Jumbo the elephant is the mascot at Tufts University near Boston where Caleb is a senior. The university colors are blue and brown. I’ve long lamented to Caleb the lack of elephants on Tufts clothing, although he alerted me that has now changed. Good. But I find university apparel ridiculously expensive. My handcrafted design offers an affordable alternative.

The other grandpa, who will be called "Opa," painted the shirt on the left.

The other grandpa, who will be called “Opa,” painted the shirt on the left.

My husband has not yet painted a onesie. He’s presented several ideas. One I immediately rejected. Let’s just say he’s got a unique sense of humor…

Even more colorfully creative ideas.

Even more colorfully creative ideas.

SINCE IT’S THE SEASON for baby and bridal showers, let’s hear any creative ideas you have for hands-on activities.

© Copyright 2016 Audrey Kletscher Helbling

 

Oh, baby, are these people really my relatives? July 8, 2012

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Sweet baby Hank, 11 days old.

HANK MET THE RELATIVES recently. And even though he was only 11 days old then, he definitely had an opinion.

“You’re all looking at my t-shirt, but can’t you see my left foot is stuck? Dad?”

Or perhaps it was the opinion of a certain aunt, who shall remain nameless.

For the most part, though, my great nephew kicked back and took everything in stride—

Just a sampling of the family members who welcomed Hank, including his great grandma, my mom.

…all the cooing, the attention, the shuffling from one relative to the next…

These boots, a gift from a great aunt and uncle and cousins, upped the cuteness level.

…even the modeling of adorable patriotic boots.

Not quite a fist.

Hank kept his long fingers curled…

This was the most endearing thing to watch, little Hank tipping his head toward his mother when she spoke.

and a watchful eye on his mother, just in case.

© Copyright 2012 Audrey Kletscher Helbling