SHE DIED ON THURSDAY EVENING. My mom, 89, the woman who birthed me and cared for me and set an example of kindness, faithfulness, love and compassion that I strive to emulate.
I feel simultaneously sad and thankful. Sad because I’ve lost my mom. Grateful because she is no longer struggling to breathe, to manage pain, to endure all the challenges of a body in failing health. She is at peace now. In heaven. Reunited with loved ones. With her Lord. That comforts me.
Because I have yet to see Mom in death, my grief seems stifled. Not yet unleashed. I have not experienced a crying-my-eyes-out moment over her death. Over other matters, yes. But the uncontrollable tears of mourning will come. Soon.
In these first days of decisions and stressors and sleepless nights and exhaustion so extensive I wonder how I can function, I press on. Soon things will settle and reality will arrive like an unwelcome visitor. And when that happens, I will be ready. Sort of. I recognize that losing one’s mother is unlike any other loss in its profoundness.
For now, my posting may be irregular. I promise a future post in which I share more about my dear sweet mother.
© Copyright 2022 Audrey Kletscher Helbling
My heart goes out to you, Audrey. You are so right, losing your mom is unlike any other loss. I do understand your mixed feelings – especially since she was in pain and life was a struggle for her. I am grateful for your faith and assurance of eternity where we all will be rejoined one day. God bless and comfort you. ❤
Thank you for your heartfelt and comforting words, Jan.
Eloquently and beautifully written. Thank you for sharing this deeply personal moment. Praying for our Lord to uphold you in his righteous right hand as you mourn the loss of your mother.
Dear Jane, thank you for your ongoing support and prayers. I appreciate you.
Audrey, I am so sorry for the grief you are having but have the comfort that she no longer suffers and is reunited with your dad and all her family who have gone before her. Aunt Arlene was a wonderful sweet lady!!
Cousin Bev, thank you for your lovely words about Mom. I agree. And, yes, she now rejoins loved ones like your parents and many others in heaven.
I am so very sorry for your loss. It is “weird” time as I call it. That time after the loss of the last parent. I found myself alternating between so many emotions — none of it seeming real. You and your family continue to be in my prayers as you are on one of the most difficult journeys ever. All my love, Audrey.
My dearest Beth Ann, thank you. Words cannot express how grateful I feel for your love, support and prayers. I know you can relate with the loss of your mom still so new.
I am so sorry to hear you loss your mom. Sending prayers and love my friend to you and your family. Take Care
Thank you, Renee. I so appreciate your support, love and prayers.
Audrey & family, peace be with you at this time!
Thank you, Barb. Peace is most certainly needed, on many levels.
I’m so sorry, Audrey, to hear of the loss of your dear mother. With your words over the years of following your blog, I feel that I have come to know her, in a way. Your words honor her, and I truly hope that in time, these same memories will give you comfort. Wishing you peace and strength.
Jennifer, thank you for your condolences and for stating that you’ve grown to know my mom through the years via my writing. I appreciate that sentiment. Mom was truly one of the kindest and most loving individuals I’ve ever known. Every facet of her exuded care for others. I will eventually share my last memory with her. It is one I will treasure forever and a blessing beyond measure.
I’m so sorry for the loss of your mom. It’s so hard to lose her.
Prayers for you and your family.
Thank you. I appreciate your sympathies and your prayers. It helps to know others are uplifting me and my family in prayer.
May God give you peace and comfort in your time of sorrow. I’m thinking of you and your family as you prepare, travel and celebrate your mother.
Thank you, dear Ann. Your words touch me deeply. Your care reminds me how blessed I am by kind, loving and supportive friends. Thank you for being among them.
I am so sorry to hear your mother has passed away. It is difficult; no doubt you will think of her every day. My sympathy and prayers.
Colleen, thank you for your sympathetic words. Every single comment here helps me in my grief journey.
Audrey, sorry for your loss and prayers to you and your family. My mom be at peace and all of you find comfort in the shared memories of good times.
Sue, thank you for your kind words of encouragement. And, yes, memories will ease the grief.
My sympathy on the loss of your mother. Praying you will find strength and comfort from your family and friends through this difficult time.
Thank you, Bernadette. I’m already feeling such strength and comfort in the encouraging words of friends and family. Words matter.
Sending heartfelt sympathy and prayers to you and your family.
Becky, thank you for your sympathy and prayers. I am touched by the outpouring of concern and care from my readers, you among them.
I’m so sorry for your loss…and continuing to pray for you and your family, and the upcoming funeral.
Thank you, Valerie. I appreciate your care and your prayers, which are much needed now and in the days ahead.
I am sincerely sorry about the loss of your lovely mother, my heart hurts for you and with you. Praying for you and your family.
Dear Judy, thank you for expressing such lovely sentiments and for your prayers. They are needed.
Audrey, my deepest sympathies to you. Losing your mom is one of the hardest losses there is, which I know from experience. My mom passed 11 years ago and I still think of and miss her every day. I still “talk” to her and sometimes I believe I hear her answer. You mentioned not having that deep, sobbing crying session yet; I think it will come — possibly when you least expect it, when something, a few months from now, triggers a memory — happy or sad or even mundane — and the tears will flow. And then you’ll feel better. May you have many good memories and friends surrounding you right now.
Thank you, Sherri. I truly feel surrounded by friends right here in the comments section. Thank you for your insights in to dealing with the death of a mother. I’m sorry you lost yours 11 years ago.
I’m sorry to hear about your mom. I lost my 92 year old mom this year as well. She ran a faithful race. She left a legacy of love. And she is finally home. She left this earth in peace knowing that Jesus Christ her Savior had won her soul for eternity. She knew Him and bore the resemblance of Him. I know one day I’ll see her again in all her glory.
Amazing grace how sweet the sound…She went on to her eternal reward. All of heaven rejoiced. Our loss. Her gain.
I appreciate your faith-focused perspective. I’m sorry you, too, are grieving the recent loss of your mom.
Oh so sorry. Please keep all the good memories close in the days ahead.
I have a wonderful final memory which I will share, probably next week. Now I need time to process. Thank you for your sympathies.
I’m just so sorry Audrey, continued prayers for peace as you face the days ahead without your dear mom!
Thank you, dear Jackie. Prayers for peace are much-needed.
Audrey, I’m so sorry for your loss. 💔
Thank you. I appreciate your condolences.
I’m sorry to hear about your loss. Please accept my sincere condolences. At times like this I always find comfort in the Gospel of John, chapters 14 and 15. Hopefully you can find some small solace in them as well.
Bruce, thank you for reaching out to me with your sympathy and also for referencing those chapters in John. I just read them and they definitely are of comfort.
In addition to the death of my mom, my cousin Randy (Harold and Marilyn Kletscher’s second son) died unexpectedly on Saturday. He was only 50 and leaves behind a wife and 8-year-old daughter. His funeral is tomorrow at St. John’s in Vesta. It’s been a difficult week for the Kletscher family. I am thankful for the faith (of forefathers) that sustains us, especially in times of grief. Again, thank you for reaching out to me. I appreciate it.
I’m so sorry for your loss, Audrey. That’s a major loss. Hugs!
Thank you, Tami. I feel your warm hug on this cold Minnesota morning.
I am deeply sorry for your loss. She was a Christian example to us all. I know her life was not easy, but she modeled a positive acceptance of life’s ups and downs, and lived her Christian faith. My deepest condolences to your whole family.. God be with you all and bring you His comfort…Laurine Jannusch
Laurine, thank you for so accurately summarizing how Mom lived her life, in Christian faith. I appreciate your message of comfort. It means a lot to me.
Condolences from here. Hugs and love in your moments of grief.
I feel your hugs and love all the way from The Netherlands, Paula. Thank you.
Thinking of you Audrey and keeping you close in my heart. She raised a wonderful daughter! You!
Dearest Ruth, you have no idea how much your kind words touch me. Thank you. It’s been a difficult and stressful week.
I am very sorry for your loss. Stay well!
Thank you, Charles. I appreciate your sympathy. So kind of you to reach out to me.
So sorry for your sad loss, Audrey. Your love for her shines through your writing, and her very sweet face makes me think she was dearly loved all her long life. I hope you can take comfort in the memory of her love for you.
Thank you, Judith. Yes, Mom was dearly loved. I have many a wonderful memory of my kind and loving mom.
Audrey – you used several lovely pictures of you and Arlene for 2021 Mother’s Day, such a strong resemblance. Arlene is such a strong name, I know several. Another lovely in her obituary. 89. whew. As I approach 80…a dear friend since 5th gr. Girl Scouts and I caught a movie yesterday. We’ve shared many a funeral pew. I’m sure at Sat.’s funeral, you were surrounded by support. But there’s only “one Mom”. You do her – and your Dad – proud. God’s Peace to you…and Mom. (It is an emotional roller coaster)
Thank you, Sandra.