NOT FAR FROM THE CHURCH, bannered in the window of a downtown Red Wing business, I spotted uplifting signage: you are valued. you are enough. you are worthy. you are loved. I always appreciate such positive public postings of care and affirmation.
And then, just up the street across from the public library and a small park, I noticed rows of fake tombstones placed upon a corner of the Christ Episcopal Church yard. From a distance, I thought this to be part of a Halloween display. But when I got closer, I realized I was looking at something far scarier. This was a memorial to the 24 Minnesotans who died as a result of domestic violence in 2024. It also honors three others whose deaths are called “suspicious,” with many details yet unknown, but enough to be included in the Violence Free Minnesota “We Remember 2024 Report.”
It is sobering and sad to stand on a busy street corner in the heart of a beautiful Mississippi River town in southern Minnesota on a lovely October morning and ponder these lives lost. Yet, this needs to be known, to be publicly shared, especially now during National Domestic Violence Awareness Month.
Hope Coalition, an advocacy and support organization for domestic abuse survivors and their families in Goodhue and Wabasha counties, placed this temporary graveyard against the backdrop of the impressive 1871 stone church with a mission of “Serving God. Serving our Community.”
As I paused, I felt the power of this public display revealed in photos, ages and dates. To place the faces of domestic violence victims upon fake tombstones personalizes the crime. You can’t look at those photos without understanding that these were individuals who were valued and loved.
Center front were the images of three men, all killed while responding to a 911 call regarding an alleged sexual assault in Burnsville on February 18, 2024. Shot to death were Burnsville police officers Paul Elmstrand and Matthew Ruge, both 27, and paramedic/firefighter Adam Finseth, 40. It was a high profile case as were the murders of four in Duluth on November 7, 2024. Kathryn “Kat” Ramsland, 45, and her son, Oliver Nephew, 7, and Erin Abramson, 47, and her son, Jacob Nephew, 15, were shot and killed in their homes in a case of domestic violence.
Those who died due to domestic violence in Minnesota in 2024 come from all areas of the state. Rural. Suburban. Urban. This crime knows no geographical or economic boundaries, no age limits, no educational or job status… Each life lost means someone, some family, is grieving.
That includes in Red Wing, the very city where I stood in the churchyard viewing the photos on tombstones. Andrea “Drea” Broyld, 41, who worked at a local coffee shop, was shot and killed inside her Red Wing home on November 17, 2024. The suspected shooter has been charged with second-degree murder. As the anniversary of Andrea’s death approaches, I expect a wave of grief will sweep across the community as people remember the nice young woman who wrote encouraging notes on coffee cups.
We should all encourage one another, in life in general, but especially in cases of domestic abuse and violence where listening and support are essential. If something doesn’t look or feel or seem right, it likely isn’t. Trust your gut. That’s a starting point. So is awareness. And seeking professional help.
While I never expected to happen upon a “We Remember 2024” display in a churchyard, I’m grateful I did. Photographing this gives me the opportunity to raise awareness about domestic abuse and violence. And it gives me the opportunity, too, to repeat these words: you are valued. you are enough. you are worthy. you are loved.
FYI: Click here to reach Violence Free Minnesota and the “We Remember 2024” report. This features the photos, stories and other information about those killed in acts of domestic violence last year. To learn more about Hope Coalition, click here. And to learn about Christ Episcopal Church in Red Wing and some of the great work they do in the community, click here.
If you, or someone you know, is being abused (whether physically, psychologically, mentally, financially or otherwise), please seek help. Call 911 if you feel threatened and/or your life is in danger.
© Copyright 2025 Audrey Kletscher Helbling
Minnesota Prairie Roots 
Thank you for sharing this Audrey. Very moving and powerful. As stress continues to build around us, domestic violence does as well. This is a very important post and is much appreciated.
You are welcome, Kathy. You are correct that domestic violence grows as the stress around us does.
That is a powerful visual display of domestic violence. Thank you for sharing it.
You are welcome, Colleen. I do what I can to increase awareness.
these are incredibly moving, powerful and heartbreaking. these stories need to be told, these people need to not be forgotten, and their faces need to be shown so that people can see that they were real people, not just numbers. thank you for sharing this.
You are welcome. And, yes, this needs to be seen.
Oof, what an impactful, eye-opening presentation for Domestic Violence Awareness Month, Audrey. This is another topic that deeply affects me. In 1980 my aunt was murdered, shot several times in the chest in front of her 2 small children, when the man she had been in a ‘tumultuous’ relationship with broke through the front door of the place she moved to, to get away from him. We didn’t have a phone back then; we heard about it on the news before we were told by family. It was a such a devastating punch in the gut to see her name on the news and that she was dead. I will never forget that moment in time. Later, a neighbor drove a couple miles to get us to answer a call from grandma, so she could fill us in on the details.
It’s crushing to know these things still happen in the world.
Oh, Rose, I am deeply sorry that your aunt was murdered in a case of domestic violence. This is incredible trauma for you and your extended family. I appreciate that you shared this story. This is personal and tragic and awful in every way imaginable.
Thank you for helping to raise awareness about this pervasive issue. I monitor 911 reports for my very small, densely populated urban neighborhood. It is unreal how many of the calls are domestic-related. At least here, victims’ cries for help have a chance of being heard, as many of our apartment buildings are over 100 years old, lack soundproofing, and are close together.
I’m not surprised by the number of 911 calls that are domestic-related. My uncle, who was a Minneapolis police officer, always said that domestics were the most dangerous calls officers responded to and I don’t doubt that. This was decades ago…, but I bet that still holds true. Emotions run especially high during domestic-related calls.
What a powerful display for Domestic Awareness… Thanks for keeping us aware and on the “look out” with your posts.
This really was an effective display.
That is a very powerful display and very well done.
It certainly is that.