Minnesota Prairie Roots

Writing and photography by Audrey Kletscher Helbling

Domestic Violence Awareness Month: Remembering in Red Wing October 30, 2025

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An affirming sign photographed in a storefront window in downtown Red Wing. (Minnesota Prairie Roots copyrighted photo October 2025)

NOT FAR FROM THE CHURCH, bannered in the window of a downtown Red Wing business, I spotted uplifting signage: you are valued. you are enough. you are worthy. you are loved. I always appreciate such positive public postings of care and affirmation.

The “We Remember 2024” display outside Christ Episcopal Church, Red Wing. (Minnesota Prairie Roots copyrighted photo October 2025)

And then, just up the street across from the public library and a small park, I noticed rows of fake tombstones placed upon a corner of the Christ Episcopal Church yard. From a distance, I thought this to be part of a Halloween display. But when I got closer, I realized I was looking at something far scarier. This was a memorial to the 24 Minnesotans who died as a result of domestic violence in 2024. It also honors three others whose deaths are called “suspicious,” with many details yet unknown, but enough to be included in the Violence Free Minnesota “We Remember 2024 Report.”

The front “tombstone” explains the project. (Minnesota Prairie Roots copyrighted photo October 2025)

It is sobering and sad to stand on a busy street corner in the heart of a beautiful Mississippi River town in southern Minnesota on a lovely October morning and ponder these lives lost. Yet, this needs to be known, to be publicly shared, especially now during National Domestic Violence Awareness Month.

Christ Church, according to its website, actively reaches out into the community via a Coat Shed, the food shelf, a “Feeding of the 5,000” event, housing Hope & Harbor and much more. (Minnesota Prairie Roots copyrighted photo October 2025)

Hope Coalition, an advocacy and support organization for domestic abuse survivors and their families in Goodhue and Wabasha counties, placed this temporary graveyard against the backdrop of the impressive 1871 stone church with a mission of “Serving God. Serving our Community.”

It’s heartbreaking to see the faces and then to go online and read the stories. (Minnesota Prairie Roots copyrighted photo October 2025)

As I paused, I felt the power of this public display revealed in photos, ages and dates. To place the faces of domestic violence victims upon fake tombstones personalizes the crime. You can’t look at those photos without understanding that these were individuals who were valued and loved.

In the second row you will see the mock tombstones of the police officers and paramedic/firefighter shot in Burnsville. Matthew Ruge, center, lived in Northfield in my county of Rice. (Minnesota Prairie Roots copyrighted photo October 2025)

Center front were the images of three men, all killed while responding to a 911 call regarding an alleged sexual assault in Burnsville on February 18, 2024. Shot to death were Burnsville police officers Paul Elmstrand and Matthew Ruge, both 27, and paramedic/firefighter Adam Finseth, 40. It was a high profile case as were the murders of four in Duluth on November 7, 2024. Kathryn “Kat” Ramsland, 45, and her son, Oliver Nephew, 7, and Erin Abramson, 47, and her son, Jacob Nephew, 15, were shot and killed in their homes in a case of domestic violence.

Oliver Nephew was only seven when he was murdered. (Minnesota Prairie Roots copyrighted photo October 2025)

Those who died due to domestic violence in Minnesota in 2024 come from all areas of the state. Rural. Suburban. Urban. This crime knows no geographical or economic boundaries, no age limits, no educational or job status… Each life lost means someone, some family, is grieving.

That includes in Red Wing, the very city where I stood in the churchyard viewing the photos on tombstones. Andrea “Drea” Broyld, 41, who worked at a local coffee shop, was shot and killed inside her Red Wing home on November 17, 2024. The suspected shooter has been charged with second-degree murder. As the anniversary of Andrea’s death approaches, I expect a wave of grief will sweep across the community as people remember the nice young woman who wrote encouraging notes on coffee cups.

Kathryn Ramsland was shot and killed along with her son, Oliver Nephew. (Minnesota Prairie Roots copyrighted photo October 2025)

We should all encourage one another, in life in general, but especially in cases of domestic abuse and violence where listening and support are essential. If something doesn’t look or feel or seem right, it likely isn’t. Trust your gut. That’s a starting point. So is awareness. And seeking professional help.

Two more victims, Victoria Jo Gamble, 38, strangled in Sauk Rapids, and Payao Vang, 27, shot and killed in Empire. (Minnesota Prairie Roots copyrighted photo October 2025)

While I never expected to happen upon a “We Remember 2024” display in a churchyard, I’m grateful I did. Photographing this gives me the opportunity to raise awareness about domestic abuse and violence. And it gives me the opportunity, too, to repeat these words: you are valued. you are enough. you are worthy. you are loved.

FYI: Click here to reach Violence Free Minnesota and the “We Remember 2024” report. This features the photos, stories and other information about those killed in acts of domestic violence last year. To learn more about Hope Coalition, click here. And to learn about Christ Episcopal Church in Red Wing and some of the great work they do in the community, click here.

If you, or someone you know, is being abused (whether physically, psychologically, mentally, financially or otherwise), please seek help. Call 911 if you feel threatened and/or your life is in danger.

© Copyright 2025 Audrey Kletscher Helbling

 

Focusing on the stats & stories of domestic abuse & violence in Minnesota October 17, 2023

Filed under: Uncategorized — Audrey Kletscher Helbling @ 5:00 AM
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Lights glow purple on the Rice County Government Services building in Faribault in recognition of Domestic Violence Awareness Month. The moody sky fits the topic, the arrow on the pavement (from my perspective) pointing to hope, a way out of an abusive relationship. (Minnesota Prairie Roots copyrighted photo October 2023)

BEVERLY BOARDED THE GREYHOUND BUS, battered suitcase in hand, journal and hastily grabbed clothes zippered inside. She felt worn down. Exhausted. On this day, she chose to leave, to flee her husband’s physical, emotional and verbal abuse. As Beverly walked down the aisle to her seat, her mood lightened. But then she spotted Thomas approaching the bus, face flashing anger, clenched fists threatening.

This anthology, featuring Minnesota writers or those with a connection to Minnesota, includes my short story about domestic abuse. (Book cover image sourced online)

This account of domestic abuse is fictional. I wrote the story, “Evidence,” which recently published and received an honorable mention in Talking Stick 32, Twist in the Road, a Minnesota-based anthology of stories and poetry. Even I don’t know how Beverly’s story ends. Will Thomas bust through the doors of the bus, hunt down his wife? Kill her?

Every day across Minnesota and beyond, scenarios like Beverly’s unfold in real life. The faces and places and circumstances differ. But the threat is real, as real as my fictional version aimed to not only provide a suspenseful read but also to raise awareness about domestic abuse.

A promo for the “2022 Homicide Report.” (Source: Violence Free Minnesota Facebook page)

October marks Domestic Violence Awareness Month. And that began in Minnesota with the release of the “2022 Homicide Report: Relationship Abuse in Minnesota” by Violence Free Minnesota. The report states that “at least 24 people were killed due to intimate partner homicide in 2022.” A further break-down of that shows at least 20 women and one man died from intimate partner violence and at least three bystanders/intervenors also died. Their ages ranged from 13 to 66. They lived in all areas of Minnesota from rural to urban.

Margie Brown Holland (my former neighbor’s daughter) and her unborn daughter, Olivia, were murdered in 2013 in an act of domestic violence. Information about Margie was displayed on a t-shirt as part of The Clothesline Project exhibit I saw in Owatonna in 2015. This exhibit is available for display through Violence Free Minnesota. (Minnesota Prairie Roots copyrighted file photo July 2015)

While statistics and summaries matter, it is the stories which make the greatest impact. This report includes those, along with photos of nearly every homicide victim. Those stories begin on page 47, well into the 66-page report which is packed with powerful information that really should be read by every adult.

I focused my attention first on Chandra Lanae Pelch of nearby Medford. The 18-year-old was shot six times by her boyfriend in a murder-suicide on June 3, 2022. While the profile on Chandra is short, it is enough to break my heart. She leaves behind an infant son and loving family and friends.

I was also drawn to the story of Isaac Jon Hoff, 13, stabbed to death by his mother’s boyfriend, now serving 17 years in prison for his murder. It’s another heartbreaking case of domestic violence, of a woman attempting to defend herself, of a man grabbing a knife from her hand, of a son stabbed as he stood behind his mother. They were under an order of protection against their attacker. Isaac, who was described as “spunky, big-hearted and loved,” managed to call 911. He died later at the hospital. Isaac was from small town Olivia in southern Minnesota.

And then there’s Kimberly Ann Robinson, 41, who was found dead from a gunshot wound and blunt force trauma injuries on the side of a road in Rochester. Her boyfriend has been charged in her murder. She was a mother of three.

An excerpt from the 2016 book “She Stays” by HOPE Center Director Erica Staab-Absher explains why a woman stays in an abusive relationship. (Text copyright of Erica Staab-Absher)

Each story in this report deserves attention, for each person lived and loved and was loved. None were to blame for their horrific deaths, just like Beverly in my fictional story did nothing to deserve the physical and emotional abuse inflicted upon her by her husband. Domestic abuse, at its core, is about power and control. Too often, people ask, “Why didn’t she just leave?” That, in essence, shifts blame to the victim. This report explains “why” in “VICTIM’S ATTEMPT TO LEAVE THE ABUSER.”

The “2022 Homicide Report” does a good job of revealing the “whys” and of expanding on domestic abuse/violence-related topics within the legal system, racial disparities, healthcare, economic abuse, public/workplace violence and more. The report also includes recommendations in each of those target areas. One section even makes recommendations to the media about covering domestic violence.

Inspirational and honoring words are embedded in a mosaic honoring Barb Larson, killed in an act of domestic violence at her workplace, the Faribault Area Chamber of Commerce and Tourism, on December 23, 2016. (Minnesota Prairie Roots copyrighted file photo)

In the all of this, in the awfulness of these 24 deaths in Minnesota in 2022, we can all learn, grow our compassion, support and understanding, begin to recognize the warning signs of domestic abuse. There is hope and help available through advocacy groups and organizations, shelters and more. But it takes courage to seek help while under the power and control of an abuser. In my fictional story, Beverly found that courage on the day she grabbed her battered suitcase with her documenting journal zippered inside and boarded that Greyhound bus. But did she survive? The truth is, I don’t know.

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FYI: Talking Stick 32, Twist in the Road includes not only my fictional story about domestic abuse, but four other fictional short stories and two poems on the topic. Particularly powerful is the poem “At the Cafe” by Mary Scully Whitaker in which the author and a waitress witness emotional abuse and threats of violence against a woman, then intervene. The anthology, published by the Jackpine Writers’ Bloc, is available through Amazon.

If you are a victim of domestic abuse, know that help is available. Have a plan in place to leave safely, recognizing that leaving an abuser is a particularly dangerous time. You are not alone. And you are not to blame.

© Copyright 2023 Audrey Kletscher Helbling