Minnesota Prairie Roots

Writing and photography by Audrey Kletscher Helbling

Remembering Mom three years after her death January 13, 2025

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Me with my mom in January 2020, right before COVID restrictions stopped visits to care centers. I saw little of Mom in the final years of her life due to the pandemic. (Minnesota Prairie Roots copyrighted file photo January 2020 by Randy Helbling)

TODAY, JANUARY 13, MARKS three years since my mom died. I hadn’t intended to write about this anniversary date. But then two friends blogged on topics that changed my mind.

My dear friend Beth Ann from North Carolina, who blogs at It’s Just Life, writes today about observing a grocery store encounter between a daughter and elderly mother that reminded her of her sweet mom whom she lost several years ago. The point of Beth Ann’s post is that grief comes in the most unexpected of moments and hits you hard. She’s right.

Hot fudge pudding cake slathered with real whipped cream and topped with sprinkles. (Minnesota Prairie Roots copyrighted file photo)

Then my friend Sue, who lives in Minnesota, winters in Arizona and blogs primarily about food at Ever Ready, published a post featuring Hot Fudge Sundae Cake. Waves of nostalgia and grief swept over me as I scrolled through Sue’s post. Hot Fudge Pudding Cake, as my family called this delectable, easy-to-make dessert, was a favorite of Mom’s and of me.

Neither Sue or Beth Ann could have known I would be reading their words on the third anniversary of Mom’s death. But I did. And it was meant to be because my grief needed an outlet. My friends’ writing prompted me to write this post.

The cover of the altered book created by Kathleen. (Minnesota Prairie Roots copyrighted file photo)

In the process of writing, I headed upstairs to pull a mini keepsake book from a closet. My friend Kathleen, formerly of Minnesota and now of Idaho, created the altered book for me following my mother’s death. She tapped into my blog to pull quotes, information and photos that truly summarize Mom’s life and our relationship. The book brims with words of love, faith, family and farm life, all at the essence of my mom. It truly is one of my most treasured possessions.

The first page in the keepsake book shows my mom holding me. (Minnesota Prairie Roots copyrighted file photo)

So on this day, while the grief of losing Mom feels particularly heavy, it is the creativity of friends that comforts me. Beth Ann’s “Right There in the Baking Aisle” resonates. Sue’s shared recipe brings smiles as I remember. And Kathleen’s keepsake mini altered book stirs within me so many memories of the mom I loved, and still love.

TELL ME: Who are you grieving? What can spark your grief? What comforts you in grief?

© Copyright 2025 Audrey Kletscher Helbling

 

About all the sickness circulating in Minnesota

Filed under: Uncategorized — Audrey Kletscher Helbling @ 5:00 AM
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In a bubble, at a small town carnival. (Minnesota Prairie Roots copyrighted file photo)

PART OF ME WANTS to step inside a bubble to protect myself from all the crud circulating in Minnesota right now. Influenza, norovirus, RSV, whooping cough and COVID—you name it, it’s here. There are a lot of sick people. I can’t recall a time recently when illness was so pervasive.

Certainly, I expect viruses to circulate more in the winter, especially after holiday gatherings and especially since we’re more confined to indoor spaces during cold weather. But, when Minnesota public health officials sound the alarm on increasing cases of these illness and rising hospitalizations, I listen. And what they’re sharing is certainly not the full scope of illness in Minnesota. Their stats are based only on reported and verified cases. These illnesses are clearly much more widespread.

As someone whose body does not handle viruses well, I lean toward leaning away from anyone who is coughing, sounds sick or seems unwell in general. Yet, I understand that illnesses can spread before symptoms appear. So it’s a bit of a gamble to be around people this time of year. For example, at a recent extended family holiday gathering (which I missed due to COVID), one clearly ill child infected many others with influenza. That included five in my core family and we missed celebrating Christmas due to that.

DOING WHAT I CAN TO STAY HEALTHY

For someone who is very much a people person—although I certainly like my alone time to write, read and simply be—it’s difficult to isolate myself. Yet, with a new grandson coming any day, I want to be healthy. So I am limiting my exposure by staying home more, specifically trying to avoid places where people congregate. And if I need to be in that situation, I will wear a mask, use hand sanitizer and wash my hands.

I just got over COVID and then rebound COVID a week later. But with several variants circulating in Minnesota, that’s no immunity guarantee. I’m in no hurry to get the coronavirus again, especially because of my long haul COVID. And I’ve had whooping cough, which, believe me, you do not want to get. I was severely ill with pertussis for three months in the summer of 2008. Adults, your childhood vaccine wears off. Get your booster.

STEPS YOU CAN TAKE TO PREVENT SPREADING ILLNESS

My point in writing all of this is three-fold: To raise awareness of the high levels of illness in Minnesota right now. Secondly, if you feel like you’re coming down with something, stay home. Please. Until you’re fully recovered. You may not get all that sick, but the people you infect could. And that includes me, your elderly neighbor, the woman in line at the grocery store, your friend sitting next to you in church, someone with a compromised immune system, a young child… Finally, practice good habits like coughing or sneezing into your arm, not your hands. Wash your hands. Often. Get vaccinated and stay up to date on those vaccinations, which can both prevent illness and prevent serious illness. Test for COVID if you have symptoms indicating that as a possibility. Simple actions like that help reduce spread of illnesses.

I think what it really comes down at the core is caring about others. We all need to shift our focus from beyond ourselves to considering the health of our friends, family, neighbors and, yes, even strangers. So you’re feeling sick? Stay home. Take care of yourself. Get well. Stay healthy.

© Copyright 2025 Audrey Kletscher Helbling