AFTER 22 YEARS of going to parent-teacher conferences, my husband and I attended our final one last night. The youngest of our three children, who is eight years younger than our eldest, graduates from high school in three months.
And to think we almost missed this notable occasion because I had not flipped the calendar from February to March yet. An ad in Thursday’s local daily newspaper alerted me of that evening’s sessions at Faribault High School.
En route to school, I mentally planned the extra words I would scrawl onto my name tag: “After 22 years, this is our final conference!”
But alas, the school did not provide name tags for parents on this occasion. What a disappointment. Instead, I had to inform all four of our son’s teachers that they had the privilege of concluding our 22-year parent-teacher conference tenure.
It’s been a good ride. All three of our children have worked hard in school, done their best and been respectful. Teachers have always spoken highly of them.
So then you likely wonder why we have even bothered to attend conferences.
Simply put, we care. We are interested in the individuals who educate our children. We want to connect with them. We want them to know that we care.
We’ve gained insights into our children and learned about what they’re learning, because children/teens don’t always inform parents.
Parent-teacher conferences are a two-way process. We’ve always approached these meetings with the idea that we are there to glean information as much as to share it.
And now we’re done. Twenty-two years later. I’m not all misty-eyed and sad as one teacher suggested. But I’m not jumping for joy either.
I’m simply wondering how we got from crayons to calculus in the seeming blink of an eye.
IF YOU’RE A PARENT, have you attended parent-teacher conferences? What value do you find in them? How would you improve conferences if you think improvement is needed? Please share your thoughts and stories in a comment.
Likewise, if you’re a teacher, feel free to share your thoughts and insights.
© Copyright 2012 Audrey Kletscher Helbling
Minnesota Prairie Roots 
I so appreciated conferences. My daughter had wonderful teachers and I really liked meeting them. It was also good to learn how my daughter was doing. It never hurts to have another view of your child (though I was not shocked to learn that my daughter was highly social and really loved to talk).
Sounds like your experiences have been positive. And I agree, an outside opinion and insights are always welcome given we parents aren’t always exactly objective about our children.
Beautiful – I do remember the last one – bittersweet and wow
Precisely. How did we get to this point so quickly?
On a semi-related topic, I listened to Minnesota Public Radio’s discussion this morning on college costs and choices. Quite pertinent now with my youngest deciding on college. Readers, go online to MPR and check out the discussion. It’s quite interesting.
That is a milestone for sure!! We were at one this week, too – and I was really glad to not have to go to one with that teacher again! (Hopefully our youngest won’t have him!) I am facing our last pre-school Parent-teacher conference next week, though! 🙂
Oh, dear, this does not sound good. I remember feeling that way about a few teachers, too.
Gretchen, some schools don’t publicize it, but you might be able to write a letter requesting a specific teacher. We don’t go out of our way to make it known, but we do our best to honor requests when we have them. It might be worth looking into
Thanks for the trip. This is good for parents to know.
Yes, that is good wisdom. I actually asked THREE TIMES this summer before the year even began, for them to change her, and they wouldn’t. It has NOT been horrible…just not ideal. Our school has a HUGE percentage of ELL students, and it adds a lot of hard aspects to teaching…and to administering. Up until this year I have tried to take the view that God will put my kids where He wants them…and when I tried to argue with Him and the principal this summer, I didn’t get what I wanted. I guess that ought to teach me a lesson!!!
Teachers love it when parents show up. And when they are open to hearing honesty from the teacher, but also have their own perspective and/or questions to share. In the role of the teacher, I’ve had some great parent teacher conferences and some that make me want to go hide in the bathroom and cry 😉 thanks for being in the category of great conferences for your kids’ teachers.
Good to get your perspective as a teacher, Laura. I should qualify that after I wrote the post, I remembered one teacher who wasn’t too happy with a certain daughter’s eye-rolling habit.
Your children were respected and did well because you cared. It is all too often that the parents who do not show up at conference time have children who are problems, or are having trouble learning. We put in our 19 years and now have another teacher in our family when our youngest joined the ranks of teachers 3 years ago. All of our children know that they will be their child’s first teacher.
Excellent points, Michael. I was so surprised at the low turn-out for conferences. Teachers were actually sitting there or visiting with each other because so few parents were there. And my husband and I were there during peak conference time, when most parents would be off work. What an opportunity parents miss when they fail to attend these conferences. I always gain insights and feel the exchanges are so important.
So many place so little value on education. Perhaps it is because it is so easy to get here. Where education is harder to get it seems to be valued more.
That’s a good insight. I think you are correct.