Minnesota Prairie Roots

NOT FAR FROM THE CHURCH, bannered in the window of a downtown Red Wing business, I spotted uplifting signage: you are valued. you are enough. you are worthy. you are loved. I always appreciate such positive public postings of care and affirmation.

And then, just up the street across from the public library and a small park, I noticed rows of fake tombstones placed upon a corner of the Christ Episcopal Church yard. From a distance, I thought this to be part of a Halloween display. But when I got closer, I realized I was looking at something far scarier. This was a memorial to the 24 Minnesotans who died as a result of domestic violence in 2024. It also honors three others whose deaths are called “suspicious,” with many details yet unknown, but enough to be included in the Violence Free Minnesota “We Remember 2024 Report.”

It is sobering and sad to stand on a busy street corner in the heart of a beautiful Mississippi River town in southern Minnesota on a lovely October morning and ponder these lives lost. Yet, this needs to be known, to be publicly shared, especially now during National Domestic Violence Awareness Month.

Hope Coalition, an advocacy and support organization for domestic abuse survivors and their families in Goodhue and Wabasha counties, placed this temporary graveyard against the backdrop of the impressive 1871 stone church with a mission of “Serving God. Serving our Community.”

As I paused, I felt the power of this public display revealed in photos, ages and dates. To place the faces of domestic violence victims upon fake tombstones personalizes the crime. You can’t look at those photos without understanding that these were individuals who were valued and loved.

Center front were the images of three men, all killed while responding to a 911 call regarding an alleged sexual assault in Burnsville on February 18, 2024. Shot to death were Burnsville police officers Paul Elmstrand and Matthew Ruge, both 27, and paramedic/firefighter Adam Finseth, 40. It was a high profile case as were the murders of four in Duluth on November 7, 2024. Kathryn “Kat” Ramsland, 45, and her son, Oliver Nephew, 7, and Erin Abramson, 47, and her son, Jacob Nephew, 15, were shot and killed in their homes in a case of domestic violence.

Those who died due to domestic violence in Minnesota in 2024 come from all areas of the state. Rural. Suburban. Urban. This crime knows no geographical or economic boundaries, no age limits, no educational or job status… Each life lost means someone, some family, is grieving.

That includes in Red Wing, the very city where I stood in the churchyard viewing the photos on tombstones. Andrea “Drea” Broyld, 41, who worked at a local coffee shop, was shot and killed inside her Red Wing home on November 17, 2024. The suspected shooter has been charged with second-degree murder. As the anniversary of Andrea’s death approaches, I expect a wave of grief will sweep across the community as people remember the nice young woman who wrote encouraging notes on coffee cups.

We should all encourage one another, in life in general, but especially in cases of domestic abuse and violence where listening and support are essential. If something doesn’t look or feel or seem right, it likely isn’t. Trust your gut. That’s a starting point. So is awareness. And seeking professional help.

While I never expected to happen upon a “We Remember 2024” display in a churchyard, I’m grateful I did. Photographing this gives me the opportunity to raise awareness about domestic abuse and violence. And it gives me the opportunity, too, to repeat these words: you are valued. you are enough. you are worthy. you are loved.

FYI: Click here to reach Violence Free Minnesota and the “We Remember 2024” report. This features the photos, stories and other information about those killed in acts of domestic violence last year. To learn more about Hope Coalition, click here. And to learn about Christ Episcopal Church in Red Wing and some of the great work they do in the community, click here.

If you, or someone you know, is being abused (whether physically, psychologically, mentally, financially or otherwise), please seek help. Call 911 if you feel threatened and/or your life is in danger.

© Copyright 2025 Audrey Kletscher Helbling