
MINNESOTA REMAINS A STATE in mourning over the assassinations of State Representative Melissa Hortman and her husband, Mark, nearly two weeks ago. Today the couple, and their golden retriever, Gilbert, also killed in the shootings, will lie in state inside the Capitol rotunda from noon to 5 p.m. The public can pay their respects in this building where Melissa served as speaker of the House and worked across the aisle to pass legislation in a divided legislature. Private funeral services are set for Saturday.

In this moment, on this day, I hope politics and differences can be set aside to honor and remember Melissa and Mark as loving parents, neighbors, friends and colleagues. Human beings who were gunned down in their home during the early morning hours of Saturday, June 14, by a man impersonating a police officer.
The tragedy of their deaths and the shootings of Senator John Hoffman and his wife, Yvette, also inside their home on the same morning by the same man, have left an indelible mark upon Minnesota, a place where we are known for our “Minnesota Nice.” I think we’ve lost some of that in the current divisiveness within our state and country.
But it is the Hortmans’ adult children, Sophie and Colin, who have circled us back to what really matters. In a statement released days after their parents’ murders, the siblings, among other things, called for this:
“Hope and resilience are the enemy of fear. Our parents lived their lives with immense dedication to their fellow humans. This tragedy must become a moment for us to come together. Hold your loved ones a little closer. Love your neighbors. Treat each other with respect and kindness. The best way to honor our parents’ memory is to do something, whether big or small, to make our community just a little better for someone else.”
Let’s take a closer look at some of their words. First, hope. It’s one of my favorite words because it represents the promise that things will get better. It’s not only a noun, but a verb.
Next, resilience represents strength, bouncing back from something devastating, hard, tragic. It’s possible to be resilient, especially with the support of others. I hope Sophie and Colin Hortman feel the collective support of Minnesotans. We need to lean into and on each other in this moment.

The two are asking us to come together. I’ve seen that happen after this tragedy with politicians jointly expressing their condolences and outrage over the assassinations. I hope that cohesiveness lasts. But I doubt it will. Yet, that doesn’t mean we can’t strive individually and collectively to listen, to compromise, to see each other as individuals with the same basic needs. People who laugh and cry and live and love. Separately and together.
In honor of their parents, Sophie and Colin ask us to love, to treat each other with respect and kindness. It’s really not that hard to practice all three. We are each capable of choosing love over hate. We are capable, too, of respecting others. Choose words that uplift rather than belittle. Choose words that are nice, not mean. Choose words carefully, thoughtfully. And treat others with compassion and care. Simply be kind.
Today, as we mourn the senseless deaths of Melissa and Mark Hortman, I am grateful to their children for reminding all of us how to live our lives. In their grief, Sophie and Colin show us what we can and should be. Loving, kind, respectful. And nice.
© Copyright 2025 Audrey Kletscher Helbling













































































Shining kindness, beginning in Minnesota July 29, 2025
Tags: acts of kindness, commentary, Damsite Supper Club, Faribault, kindness, kindness rocks, Kindness Rocks Inspiration Garden, Make America KIND button, Minnesota, Pine River
WHEN MY FRIEND SUE rummaged in her purse for something she wanted to give me, she pulled out a button with the message “Make America KIND.” Perfect. I am all for kindness. Sue’s simple act of gifting me with that button, which I pinned to the faded 1970s vintage denim jacket I was wearing, was an act of kindness in itself.
That got me thinking about kindness, not only because of the button, but because Sue and I, along with our husbands, had just finished lunch at the Damsite Supper Club in Pine River. Every Wednesday from 11 a.m.-2 p.m., veterans eat for free. So Sue’s spouse, Charley, enjoyed a complimentary meal as did other vets. The restaurant honors the veterans for their service with the kindness of a meal and then by inviting them to sign a dining room wall.
Right across the road, my friend reminded me, sits the Kindness Rocks Inspiration Garden. The memorial garden honors Bryce Mink, 11, who died in 2023 of undiagnosed lymphoma. Painted stones decorated with inspiring words and art fill the rock garden. The garden is a visual of kindness.
Before we went on our way, Sue had another gift for me. A bag of books. Fiction, nonfiction and poetry books she felt a “Prairie Lady” would appreciate. She’s downsizing and set aside Visibility: Ten Miles—A Prairie Memoir in Photography and Poetry, Light on the Prairie, Pioneer Girl—The Annotated Autobiography of Laura Ingalls Wilder and several other books. Sue knows me well and I’m grateful for her kindness.
KINDNESS DEFINED
What does it really mean to be kind? By my definition, the word means “being nice.” In actions and/or in words. Being generous, caring, compassionate. Being thoughtful. Giving without expecting anything in return. Doing what is right and good. Listening. Encouraging. Supporting. Many words define kindness.
My sister-in-law Rosie showed kindness to Randy and me when she surprised us with a homemade caramel roll upon our recent arrival at her lake cabin. She knows how much we love these rolls from Valeri Ann’s Family Foods, an eatery just down the highway in Merrifield. What a thoughtful gesture given these sweet treats sell out quickly. Rosie got the last two, saving one for us.
KINDNESS IN A HUG
Then there’s the kindness Randy and I recently extended to a stranger via a vintage desk we carried to the curb. When a passerby stopped a while later, I stepped outside to greet her. She wanted the free desk. I also invited her into my living room to look at a table we no longer need. Because the woman spoke limited English, we struggled to communicate, finally resorting to pen and paper until her friend arrived to interpret.
Eventually, the woman decided she wanted the desk only. So Randy helped load it into her friend’s car. And then I spontaneously hugged this Somali immigrant who graciously and gratefully thanked me. It felt like the right thing to do. We held each other for a moment, our embrace warm, genuine.
Kindness came full circle. It didn’t take much effort for me, Randy, Sue, Rosie and the Damsite Supper Club to “Make America KIND” in our own unique ways. Just imagine if every single person extended kindness to family, friends and strangers. This would be a much gentler, compassionate and caring country.
TELL ME: I’d like to hear about a recent act of kindness you either gave or received.
© Copyright 2025 Audrey Kletscher Helbling