Minnesota Prairie Roots

Writing and photography by Audrey Kletscher Helbling

Three phrases I’d like to ban June 13, 2016

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ARE THERE CERTAIN WORDS or phrases that bother you? I mean big time irritate you to the point that you want to shout, DO NOT SAY (WRITE) THOSE WORDS TO ME!

Here are the top phrases/words I would like to ban:

 

Words buck up

 

My husband once advised me to “Buck up!” when I was gasping for air while in the middle of a major asthmatic type attack. I was ill at the time, severely ill, with whooping cough. Rather than suggesting I “Buck up!”, he probably should have been dialing 911. (In his defense, neither of us fully realized the seriousness of the situation.)

Why do I dislike those two words? In my particular instance, no amount of bucking up would solve my medical emergency. This was out of my control. Telling someone to “Buck up!” minimizes their situation/issue/problem. Rather than suggest someone toughen up, how about offering help and/or a solution? Or simply listen.

 

Words awesome

 

How can everything in life be awesome? It is the most overused trendy word. That’s awesome. That’s awesome. That’s awesome. Really?

Rather than apply the worn-out word awesome, which has lost all meaning because of its repetitive use, tell me precisely why something is awesome. Is something awesome because it’s an incredible accomplishment? Is something awesome because it pleases you and solves a problem? Is something awesome because it’s uniquely creative? Use specific words that hold meaning.

 

Words it is what it is

 

I’ve heard these five words spoken in trying situations. These are not words anyone facing or managing a crisis or challenge needs to hear. Why? This dismissive phrase only makes a person feel worse.

Instead, validate an individual’s feelings and then offer support, comfort, encouragement and/or assistance. No one needs to be reminded that a situation is bad; that’s already a known.

Now it’s your turn. Tell me what words/phrases bug you. Or, if you wish, defend usage of the words/phrases I dislike.

© Copyright 2016 Audrey Kletscher Helbling

 

Minnesota skylines January 28, 2016

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The Minneapolis skyline as photographed from Interstate 35 in Burnsville.

The Minneapolis skyline as photographed from Interstate 35 in Burnsville. Minnesota Prairie Roots file photo, June 2015.

MINNESOTA HAS LONG been divided. Rural vs. urban. The area outside the Twin Cities metro is often referred to as Greater Minnesota or Outstate Minnesota. I don’t mind the “greater.” But outstate? Isn’t every inch of land, every single one of our 87 counties, part of the state of Minnesota?

The division of urban and rural is always most noticeable during the legislative session. Or during road construction season.

Silos mark the rural skyline on a farm in the Prior Lake area.

Silos mark the rural skyline on a farm in the Prior Lake area. Minnesota Prairie Roots file photo.

Despite our division and differences, we are still Minnesotans. And whether you like the busyness of the city or the quiet of the country, or something in between, you can find your right place in the diverse geography of our state.

The gravel road that runs past my middle brother's rural acreage just north of Lamberton, Minnesota.

Just north of Lamberton, Minnesota, in Redwood County, the county in which I was born. Minnesota Prairie Roots file photo.

Follow prairie to the Dakotas and hills to Wisconsin. Angle lakes and canoe winding rivers. Secret yourself away in woods or free your spirit under wide skies. Choose an office cubicle or a tractor cab to box you in. Meander along gravel roads or rush along the interstate.

The downtown Minneapolis skyline, up close.

The downtown Minneapolis skyline, up close. Minnesota Prairie Roots file photo.

Whatever your preferred skyline, embrace it. Urban isn’t better than rural and rural isn’t better than urban. Not in the sense of a grand, broad statement. But from a personal perspective, we have our preferences. And that is good. Our state needs balance. And we should respect that.

© Copyright 2015 Audrey Kletscher Helbling

 

In Faribault: How connecting & listening can trump ignorance & fear December 17, 2015

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A snippet of businesses along Central Avenue in historic downtown Faribault.

A snippet of businesses along Central Avenue in historic downtown Faribault.

I NEVER EXPECTED the conversation to turn away from college as I chatted with a young man Saturday afternoon on a downtown Faribault street corner. But it did. One minute we were talking about his future and life in southeastern Minnesota. And then he was asking me what I thought of Republican Presidential candidate Donald Trump.

But first, I’ll back up and explain how I even struck up a conversation with this 20-something. He noticed my long-lensed camera as he strode down the sidewalk toward me, hamming it up for the camera. I didn’t click the shutter button. Now I wish I had. Just to show you this millennial with the wide smile and warm, welcoming persona.

Mike Fuchs guided his horses along Central Avenue on Saturday afternoon for free rides in Santa's Wagon.

Mike Fuchs guides his horses along Central Avenue on Saturday afternoon for free rides in Santa’s Wagon.

I felt I owed him an explanation. So I pointed to the horse-drawn wagon traveling along Central Avenue, the reason I was there with my Canon DSLR. Together we admired the team of horses.

Then I noticed his University of Minnesota sweatshirt and I asked if he is a student. He was, for a semester. He’s lived in Faribault for awhile, found people mostly friendly, but the town too small.

Soon he’s moving to South Dakota’s capitol city with his dad. I inquired about his future; he’s interested in business. “Promise me,” I said, “that you’ll go back to college.” He nodded, then high-fived his youthful brown palm against my aging white hand. It’s one of those spontaneous moments in life that I will always remember. He appears to be the type of person who will accomplish his goals and I told him so. I genuinely meant that and he thanked me.

Then he brought up Donald Trump, expressing his deep concern over Trump’s plan to ban Muslims from coming into the U.S. I told him exactly what I think of this Presidential candidate and how I fear for our country if he is elected President. I should have listened more than I talked. But I sensed that it was important for this young man to know that I, for one, don’t support Trump’s proposal. I don’t want to start a heated political debate here because that’s not the point of this post.

Adding to the artsy aspect of Car Cruise Night, was this colorful attire worn by Faribault

I photographed these Somali women walking through downtown Faribault during a Car Cruise Night in July. Minnesota Prairie Roots file photo 2015.

The point is that I connected with this young man. I’ve heard way too many stories and reports in my community of locals afraid to come downtown Faribault, where many Somali families live. Complaints range from Somalis hangings out on street corners to a lack of respect, unpleasant odors and more. I didn’t feel afraid or uncomfortable. Not on this Saturday. Or any other day. I was treated with respect and always have been.

This teen represented Somalia at the International Festival Faribault

This teen represented Somalia at the August 2015 International Festival Faribault. Minnesota Prairie Roots file photo 2015.

How many people, I wondered, pause to speak one-on-one with our newest immigrants? Sometimes that’s all it takes to begin to break down barriers, to understand one another, to see someone as an individual rather than a person of a different color, faith or ethnicity.

These young Somali women represent the changing face of Faribault. Minnesota Prairie Roots file photo.

These young Somali women represent the changing face of Faribault. Minnesota Prairie Roots file photo 2012.

Look into eyes. Listen to a voice. Hear hopes and dreams. Connect.

#

FYI: Click here for a must-see photo collection of Somalis living in Minneapolis. I found this link on Bob Collins’ NewsCut column at Minnesota Public Radio.

© Copyright 2015 Audrey Kletscher Helbling

 

Part I: Discovering Albert Lea’s strongest asset, in my opinion October 27, 2015

EXITING INTERSTATE 35 in southeastern Minnesota into Albert Lea, I saw the usual hotels, fast food places, a Big Box retailer and gas stations that could have made this Anywhere, USA. Nothing special. Just another place to fill up with food or gas, turn around and continue onto a destination.

But Albert Lea was my destination on a recent day trip to explore this city of some 18,000.

I knew little of this community, only that it hosts the annual Big Island Rendezvous and Eddie Cochran Days and is home to a chemical dependency treatment center.

 

Historic buildings in Albert Lea, 89 interchange to furniture store

 

It’s strongest asset, as I was about to discover, lies in the heart of downtown. Albert Lea boasts a Commercial Historic District with some incredible architecture. You would never know that, though, driving into town from the first exit on the north. You would never know that by skimming the tourism website or reading the Experience Albert Lea brochure (which mentions the district but features no photos of old buildings).

 

Historic buildings in Albert Lea, 57 tops of buildings

 

An informational kiosk in the downtown shares info about historic buildings.

A kiosk in the downtown shares info about historic buildings.

 

Historic buildings in Albert Lea, 56 furniture store

 

I discovered this treasure of historic buildings simply by driving into the downtown. One hundred and fifteen buildings comprise the Albert Lea Commercial Historic District, according to information I later found on the Minnesota Historical Society website. Wow.

Architectural details on the bank.

Architectural details on the former Albert Lea State Bank building.

This stunning old bank building, if all goes as hoped, will provide housing and serve as an art center.

The former bank building, one of the most impressive buildings downtown.

Sculpted lady above the bank building entry.

Sculpted lady above the bank building entry.

If you appreciate aged buildings that are architecturally stunning, then you must tour Albert Lea. Especially impressive is the massive former Albert Lea State Bank building anchoring a corner of South Broadway. Built in 1922 for $200,000, the structure features a marble facade and is decorated with cream hued terra cotta art. The City of Albert Lea invested about $2 million in its exterior restoration in 2007. Millions more, perhaps three times as much, are needed for additional interior (electrical, plumbing, heating/cooling, etc.) improvements.

Plans are to house the Art Center in the historic bank.

Plans are to house the Art Center in the historic bank.

The Art Center is currently in a building across the street from the bank.

The Art Center is currently in a building across the street from the bank.

A sign above the door labels the old bank as the future home of the Albert Lea Art Center. Online research also reveals that a Kansas developer plans to convert the upper floors into income-limited apartments.  However, that was contingent on securing housing tax credits, which the Minnesota Housing Finance Agency recently failed to award to the proposed project. Albert Lea officials and the developer must now decide whether to reapply for the tax credits (for the third time) or pursue other options.

A local whom I met downtown (prior to the MHFA decision) said I could probably buy the building for $10. Through November, the first floor of the old bank houses a Des Moines based West End Architectural Salvage pop-up shop, next open from 10 a.m. – 5 p.m. October 30 – November 1.

So much potential exists in Albert Lea's downtown given the volume of historic buildings.

So much potential exists in Albert Lea’s downtown given the volume of historic buildings.

Many empty storefronts occupy downtown Albert Lea. I don’t know why this surprises me. But it does. In recent years, I’ve visited all too many mid-sized Minnesota cities expecting to find bustling downtowns. Instead, I find many gaps between businesses.

A view of a side street in the downtown.

A view of a side street in the downtown.

In all fairness to Albert Lea, plenty of businesses still exist. It’s just that to a first-time visitor, multiple vacant storefronts present an impression of a struggling downtown. Correct assessment or not, visual impressions count.

Even though a sign flashed open in this antique shop, we could not figure out a way to gain entry to the business around newly-poured sidewalks.

Even though a sign flashed open in this antique shop, I could not figure out a way to gain entry to the business around newly-poured sidewalks on the day I was in town.

And, in all fairness to Albert Lea, I visited on a particularly blustery day, less than ideal conditions for fully exploring this community. The city lies between two lakes. But the weather was too blasted cold, grey and windy to even consider much time outdoors. As it was, I struggled to hold my camera steady against the wind for downtown photos. Road and sidewalk construction created additional obstacles.

 

Historic buildings in Albert Lea, 71 jeweler building

 

Will I return to Albert Lea? Perhaps.

Another former bank building in the downtown.

Another former bank building in the downtown.

I see the potential in this community for a destination downtown. That requires a strong mission/vision, money and a marketing plan that fully embraces and promotes Albert Lea’s Commercial Historic District as its greatest asset.

Tomorrow I'll take you inside the second building from the left in this image.

Tomorrow I’ll take you inside the third building from the corner in this image.

FYI: Return tomorrow to read the second part in this series from Albert Lea. I will take you inside a business that’s truly one-of-a-kind.

© Copyright 2015 Audrey Kletscher Helbling

 

What’s lacking in many small town Minnesota restaurants September 9, 2015

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A produce vendor photographed last week in downtown Pine Island, Minnesota. He was selling tomatoes, sweetcorn and melons.

A produce vendor photographed last week in downtown Pine Island, Minnesota. He was selling tomatoes, sweetcorn and melons.

IT’S THAT TIME OF YEAR in Minnesota, when farmers’ markets overflow with fresh produce, when backs of pick-up trucks are packed with fresh fruits and vegetables and parked on street corners, when gardens are yielding their bounty, when honor system roadside stands pop up.

Some of the garden-fresh vegetables I got from my brother a few days ago.

Some garden fresh vegetables from my brother and his wife who live on a rural Minnesota acreage. Minnesota Prairie Roots file photo.

There’s nothing like the heft and scent of a homegrown muskmelon, the juiciness of a just-picked watermelon, the sun-ripened taste of a vine fresh tomato, the earthy flavor of carrots pulled from Minnesota soil. Nothing you can buy in a grocery store compares to homegrown.

I appreciate those who are tenders of plants. I have neither the sunny space, or even the sincere desire, to grow a garden. But I do love to eat garden fresh produce.

The Amboy Cottage Cafe, across the street from the grain elevator along Amboy's Maine Street.

The Amboy Cottage Cafe, across the street from the grain elevator along Amboy’s Maine Street. Minnesota Prairie Roots file photo 2013.

On a recent overnight get-away in southeastern Minnesota, I was hoping my husband and I would find a restaurant that embraces seasonal cooking. I so tire of menus that feature only burgers and fries, fish, chicken sandwiches and everything deep-fat-fried. Rare is the restaurant in small town southern Minnesota that serves anything beyond that defined menu. Two exceptions that I’ve discovered are The Amboy Cottage Cafe in Amboy and the Rainbow Cafe in Pine Island. Both focus on local, seasonal fresh ingredients for their home-cooked offerings.

In less than two hours, we were feasting on Bill's sweetcorn; garden fresh potatoes purchased last week from another roadside vendor; and smoked pork chops bought fresh at a local grocery store meat counter.

This meal grilled at home included smoked pork chops and fresh potatoes and sweetcorn purchased from a roadside vendor. Minnesota Prairie Roots file photo.

I crave tasty and unique and interesting choices in restaurants. I want made-from-scratch fresh food, not food pulled from the freezer and tossed into a deep fat fryer or microwave.

A homemade sign indicates the produce available.

There are so many sources for garden fresh fruits and vegetables in rural Minnesota. This sign is posted at Twiehoff Gardens in Faribault. Minnesota Prairie Roots file photo.

Especially disappointing was a salad that accompanied a sandwich I ordered in a rural restaurant. The shredded iceberg lettuce was topped with pale, tasteless tomato slices. How difficult could it be, I wondered, to purchase Minnesota grown tomatoes or to pot a few tomato plants outside the restaurant’s back door? Or to choose Romaine lettuce over iceberg. I can’t recall the last time I purchased iceberg, but it’s been years.

My incredible raspberry chicken salad.

One of the best restaurant salads I’ve ever eaten in a small town (or anywhere): a raspberry chicken salad served at The Amboy Cottage Cafe. Minnesota Prairie Roots file photo 2013.

So many options exist for creative and delicious salads.

Are you, like me, often frustrated by the lack of creative fresh food choices in small town restaurants? Have you found an eatery that cooks outside the standard Minnesota menu box? I’d like to hear—your recommendations, your frustrations, even your thoughts on why so many rural Minnesota restaurants stick to burgers and fries and, you know, the usual.

© Copyright 2015 Audrey Kletscher Helbling

 

My initial impressions of New Prague’s Main Street July 1, 2015

A stunning sign welcomes visitors to New Prague.

An impressive sign welcomes visitors to New Prague, Minnesota.

DO YOU EVER HOLD expectations of a community that, in reality, are not what you envisioned?

Minnesota Highway 19 runs through the heart of New Prague's business district.

Minnesota Highway 19 runs through the heart of New Prague’s business district.

Such was my impression of New Prague, a southern Minnesota community of about 7,500 rooted in the Czech, Bavarian and Bohemian heritages. I expected a well-kept downtown burgeoning with lovely shops.

Beer bottles sat on windowsills and stoops at several downtown bars on a Sunday afternoon.

Beer bottles sat on windowsills and stoops at several downtown bars on a Sunday afternoon.

Instead, on a Sunday afternoon, I found a Main Street that needs a facelift or, at a minimum, an attentiveness to appearance. Cigarette butts littered on sidewalks and beer bottles perched on window sills and doorsteps outside bars did not give me a positive first impression.

J. T.'s Hideaway, one of several downtown bars.

J. T.’s Hideaway, one of several downtown bars.

Uneven and pitted sections of sidewalk made me wary of tripping. I noted worn steps and many weary looking buildings, with bricks even missing from the facades of some. I wasn’t purposely looking for these things. But they were noticeable enough that I noticed.

The old hardware store, right, has great historic character inside and out.

The old hardware store, right, has great historic character inside and out.

I also noticed many empty storefronts. Peering through the expansive front windows of the former Rynda Hardware, I spotted the loveliest of wood floors in a space that holds great potential for a business.

Looking up at the ornate architecture on the former First National Bank.

Looking up at the ornate architecture on the former First National Bank.

To the right of the old First National Bank is the former Prague theater, now DalekoArts.

To the right of the old First National Bank is the former Prague theater, now DalekoArts.

Another view of the bank and theater buildings along Main Street.

Another view of the bank and theater buildings along Main Street.

That’s a key word here. Potential. Downtown New Prague, with attention to visual presentation and detail, could really shine. The many historic buildings are an asset to this community. Some, like the former First National Bank, now home to an optometrist’s office, have been well cared for and stand as examples of what this downtown could be.

Another building with space to rent.

Another building with space to rent.

It takes money, and a strong desire, to improve the physical appearances of buildings to create a cohesive and inviting downtown. And I realize business owners are likely just getting by and don’t have extra funds.

This tasteful awning adds a punch of color without overwhelming.

This tasteful awning adds a punch of color without overwhelming.

But I see what can be done with a few simple details. Bargain Betty’s Consignment Shop, for example, sports an eye-catching pink, white and black striped awning with pleasing graphic signage that makes me want to shop there, except shops aren’t open in New Prague on Sundays. That’s understandable given these mom-and-pop business owners need a day off, too.

Love this sign for suspended from a downtown wine tasting business.

Love this sign suspended from a downtown wine tasting business.

Prairie Pond's inviting patio, closed on Sunday.

Prairie Pond’s inviting patio, closed on Sunday.

The Prairie Pond building is an example of a beautifully restored structure.

The Prairie Pond building is an example of a beautifully restored structure.

Prairie Pond Vineyard and Winery, in an exceptional restored building, has also created an outdoor patio oasis, complete with water features, between downtown buildings. My husband and I planned to sample wine there on Sunday, but found the place closed for a private party. It’s not typically open on Sundays, a disappointment.

Something as simple as this windowbox adds visual interest to downtown New Prague.

This stunning windowbox punches natural color and life into the downtown.

A mural of the 1906 Bohemian Brass Band adds artsy interest to the side of a building. However, the mural, painted in 1989, could use some freshening.

A mural of the 1906 Bohemian Brass Band adds artsy interest to the side of a building. However, the mural, painted in 1989, could use some freshening.

This weathered covered wagon atop the Prairie Saloon draws attention to the business.

This weathered covered wagon atop the Prairie Saloon draws attention to the business and gives it character.

Green spaces in the heart of a Main Street always please me. So do window boxes and planters brimming with flowers. And art. Downtown New Prague has some, but could use more. Again, it’s the seemingly simplest of details that can make a difference in how a downtown business district appears to visitors, whether they stop or continue driving through town.

I definitely want to visit this ethnic bakery. Businesses like this rooted in the town's heritage are sure to draw customers.

I definitely want to visit this ethnic bakery. Businesses like this rooted in the town’s heritage are sure to draw customers.

I don’t want New Prague folks and business owners to take my comments the wrong way, to be discouraged. Rather, I hope my observations are useful. I’ve often thought communities could benefit from an outsider’s first impressions. I’ll return to New Prague, but next time on a Saturday, when shops are open. I want to experience Main Street from the inside, too, not just the outside.

BONUS PHOTOS:

Doing something with the vacant lot next to the Prairie Saloon (right in photo) would enhance the downtown.

Doing something with the vacant lot next to the Prairie Saloon (right in photo) would enhance the downtown.

The Corner Bar is aptly named.

The Corner Bar is aptly named. Cigarette butts litter the sidewalk here as they did at other bars.

 A close-up look reveals that the Corner Bar offers karaoke by Billy.

A close-up look reveals that the Corner Bar offers karaoke by Billy. This is what I love, local character.

Another view of Main Street.

Another view of Main Street.

A variety of businesses line Main Street.

A variety of businesses line Main Street. If only all of the buildings could be restored to their former appearances, both in exterior and in subdued signage.

New Prague has a definite advantage over many other communities as a major state highway runs right through the downtown business district.

New Prague has a definite advantage over many other communities as a major state highway runs right through the downtown business district.

© Copyright 2015 Audrey Kletscher Helbling

 

Pride and Prejudice March 19, 2015

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Different cultures, all the faces of today's Faribault, mingled during the Fall Festival.

Different cultures mingled during the 2011 Fall Festival in downtown Faribault. Minnesota Prairie Roots file photo.

8:45 a.m. on Saturday:

A Somali man sweeps the sidewalk in the 300 block of Central Avenue in historic downtown Faribault before shops open at 9 a.m.

Late Saturday afternoon:

A woman throws money at a Somali teen working as a check-out clerk at a downtown Faribault grocery store. Throws, not hands.

Why am I writing about these two events observed last Saturday in my southeastern Minnesota community of some 23,000 with a significant Somali population?

These young Somali women represent the changing face of Faribault. Minnesota Prairie Roots file photo.

These young Somali women represent the changing face of Faribault. Minnesota Prairie Roots file photo.

I am sharing this because an undercurrent, OK it’s not even an undercurrent, of prejudice exists in Faribault. If your skin is any color other than white, you are open to possible disdain and contempt.

Vendors, like Riyaam, peddled their wares at the 2011 festival.

A Somali woman peddles her wares at the 2011 International Festival in Faribault. Minnesota Prairie Roots file photo.

I’ve heard it all:

They are taking our jobs, taking government hand-outs, hanging around where they don’t belong. They smell. They dress weird. They don’t know how to drive.

Two weeks ago a young man left his car running, unattended, while tending to business in a residential area of southwest Faribault. Afterward he commented that he shouldn’t have done that because of “the Somalis.” He’s from Northfield, a neighboring town.

Really?

Banadir, a Somali restaurant, is located in historic downtown Faribault.

Banadir, a Somali restaurant, is located in historic downtown Faribault. Minnesota Prairie Roots file photo.

For awhile, complaints ran rampant about Somali men hanging out on Central Avenue street corners. People said they were afraid to go downtown. These men live downtown above businesses, some of which are Somali-owned. Sidewalks are their front porches, their place to gather and converse. This is part of their culture, to meet and talk.

I wish those who continually criticize our newest immigrants could have seen the Somali man sweeping a downtown sidewalk. His efforts show respect for and pride in community.

A 60-something white woman throwing money at a Somali teen simply doing her job shows lack of respect.

No matter our ethnicity/skin color, we really need to just respect each other as human beings.

© Copyright 2015 Audrey Kletscher Helbling

 

On the cost of health insurance: Sometimes all you can do is laugh February 15, 2015

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I PROBABLY SHOULDN’T be penning this post because it’s likely to raise my blood pressure. And that’s not a good thing considering I want to avoid activity that would necessitate a doctor’s visit.

Don’t get me wrong. I am thankful for doctors and nurses and other medical professionals who possess the skills and talent to help heal people.

But I’m frustrated about the ever-rising cost of health insurance. Last year my family forked out $11,022 to cover three of us—two late fifty-somethings and a 20-year-old. Do your math. That’s just shy of $919/month.

Add on the $4,048 we paid out-of-pocket for medical expenses in 2014 and that’s a significant chunk of money going toward healthcare costs.

Info from my current health insurance documents.

Info from my current health insurance documents.

The monthly premium on my individual plan this year has dropped $30 to $412/month. Now you might think that a good thing. But, in order to keep my premium down, I switched insurance companies and now have a much higher deductible—$5,200 instead of $2,000.

When I was considering my options in November, after my then insurer informed me that my 2015 monthly rate would skyrocket from $441 to $777, I felt like I was gambling. I am. I’m gambling on not needing to visit a doctor, except for “free” preventative care, in 2015.

Sure we have “free” preventative care now, which is great. But at what cost? Is it really “free?”

And, yes, I checked into whether I qualify for financial assistance through MNsure, the state’s online health insurance marketplace. I don’t given I could get on my husband’s plan through his employer. Never mind that I would need to pay the full $777/month premium. So that option was out. That left me searching for an individual plan I could afford. (It doesn’t exist.)

Minnesota Public Radio nailed it in a February 10 headline, High deductibles keep patients away from care. (Click here to read that story.) Yes, as crazy as it sounds, many of us now carry deductibles so high that we think twice about going to the doctor. What good is health insurance then?

I consider my health insurance coverage a catastrophic plan. I need the coverage “just in case” something major happens.

These ever-rising costs need to be brought under control. The current system isn’t working for lower middle income families like mine and, I expect, most families except those fortunate enough to have full employer paid health insurance.

Employers are feeling the financial burden, too. I’d guess some small business owners have had to reduce benefits or even lay off employees.

One positive note with healthcare reform, though, is the elimination of the pre-existing condition clause that prevented me from switching insurers.

I appreciate the approach taken by Almost Iowa, a southern Minnesota blogger whose wife was recently laid off. This blogger writes humorous and sarcastic fiction. Brilliantly. He addresses the issue of health insurance premiums and deductibles in “I married the wrong girl!”  Just like the MPR story, he nailed it. (Click here to read.)

Every fiction writer knows that beneath the surface always lies some bit of truth.

“I married the wrong girl!” made me laugh out loud in an “I wish this wasn’t true” sort of way. But, as they say, laughter is the best medicine. And that doesn’t cost us anything.

FYI: Today marks the final day to open enroll through MNsure, in other words the last day you can purchase health insurance through this venue until the next open enroll later this year.

© Copyright 2015 Audrey Kletscher Helbling

 

Bullying in Minnesota: In the news again & a look back January 22, 2015

Filed under: Uncategorized — Audrey Kletscher Helbling @ 3:21 PM
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WHO AMONG YOU has been bullied?

If I could see you all, I expect many a hand would rise.

Both my arms would be waving wildly, high above my head. Me. Me. Me.

That bullying occurred more than 40 years ago. Yet, it feels like yesterday when my junior high classmates picked on me and other kids from a nearby farming community. We, apparently, did not meet their standards given our rural addresses outside the county seat.

Countless days I arrived home from school in tears. Crying over mean words. Crying and wishing with all my might that things would change or that I would never need to return to that school.

A teacher who also bullied students added to my angst as did other teachers, who simply looked the other way.

These horrible memories flash to the forefront because of a bullying incident in Minnesota that is, today, big news. News because the father of the girl being bullied created a YouTube video that shows just how mean bullies (and their parents) can be—mean as in using the “N” word against the father’s African American daughter. Click here to read background on this bullying case and to watch the father’s video.

You would think in the year 2015, with all of the discussion on bullying, all of the awareness, all of the laws, that bullying would not exist. Wishful thinking. All the talk and rules in the world will not close mouths that speak words of hatred and racism and just plain meanness. Yet we need to keep trying.

What to do. There’s no single solution. I wished back in the late 1960s that my parents would have done something—anything. But that can backfire, too, make the bullying worse.

When our son was bullied as in being spit on, pinched, pushed and kicked by a classmate, my husband and I met with his teacher. Her response: Befriend the bully. Are you kidding? Place the responsibility for solving the problem on our elementary-aged son and not hold the bully accountable? Not going to happen. Eventually we pulled our son from the school.

Recently, I was shouted at during a meeting. I sat there stunned, struggling to hold back tears. Soon thereafter I left, unable to suppress my emotions. But this time the reaction was different. Concerned individuals approached me, assuring me that I didn’t deserve the verbal attack for asking a legitimate question.

After the meeting, the man who launched those angry words at me apologized. He phoned again early the next morning to apologize. I accepted both apologies.

If only every case of bullying ended that way, with a sincere apology, acceptance of responsibility and determination to change.

That would be hoping for Utopia.

A snippet from a sign at the International Peace Garden, Nerstrand Elementary School, Minnesota.

A snippet from a sign at the International Peace Garden, Nerstrand Elementary School, Minnesota. The sign and garden do not specifically address bullying. Rather the Peace Garden advocates peace and getting along, despite our differences. Minnesota Prairie Roots file photo.

Yet, I can take my experiences and find some good therein. Because I was bullied, I am a more compassionate, caring and empathetic person, championing for others. I may have been that way without the bullying. The qualifying word would be “more.”

I can use my words in a positive way to affect change, to show others I care, really care. As we all know, words are powerful.

Now it’s your turn to speak. Please share your thoughts on bullying.

FYI: To learn more about bullying prevention, click here to reach the Pacer Center’s Kids Against Bullying website. And then click here to reach the site for teens.

© Copyright 2015 Audrey Kletscher Helbling

 

No more December 30, 2014

Filed under: Uncategorized — Audrey Kletscher Helbling @ 5:00 AM
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YOU KNOW HOW IT IS when a conversation starts and then rolls seamlessly from one topic into another and soon you have these thoughts spinning through your brain.

Here’s how it started: Sunday morning a friend told me that her husband and youngest daughter rode along with their police officer son/brother during a Christmas night shift in another city in another state. That shadowing proved uneventful. I’m sure that was just fine with my friend. No mother likes to see her son placed in a dangerous situation.

I shared that ride-along tidbit with my husband and son during Sunday dinner and then we were talking about my Uncle Bob, a retired Minneapolis police officer, and how he always said domestics were the most dangerous calls. Makes sense given the emotions involved.

The holidays often see an increase in the number of domestics. Daily we hear and read reports of (mostly) women assaulted and sometimes murdered in cases of domestic violence. Saturday evening a woman was fatally stabbed in St. Paul, allegedly by her ex-boyfriend.

Last week the Faribault Daily News, the newspaper in my community, published this headline: Faribault man charged with assaulting girlfriend, two police officers. The story included a photo of the 28-year-old repeat domestic abuse offender. I think I recognize the man.

In late October, I phoned local law enforcement when I witnessed a young man verbally attacking, grabbing and shoving a young woman. I believe it is the same man now charged with fourth-degree assault on a peace officer and domestic assault. My stomach churned. A year ago, this man was convicted of felony domestic assault and violation of an order for protection. Now this.

When will this ever end, this psychological control and manipulation, the physical and/or verbal assaults, the lies and deception that define domestic abuse? When?

I’m not privy to details about the Faribault man’s past. But any felony charge and conviction is serious. And now to read in a newspaper story of his live-in girlfriend found crying and huddling in the corner of the living room holding their two-year-old…after she was allegedly attacked.

I just want to take that young mother in my arms, embrace her, rescue her, and tell her everything will be OK.

But I can’t save her; only she can decide to leave her abuser. I can’t promise her everything will be alright, that the judicial system will work, that this man will never harm her, or any other woman, ever again.

It would be all too easy to give up. Yet, we cannot. Ever. As a society, as human beings, as parents who love our daughters, as sisters who love our sisters, as friends who love friends, we cannot simply walk away.

Like the Hope Center in Faribault, recently awarded a $135,000 federal grant to fight domestic violence through The Blueprint for Safety Project, we must continue to do all we can to educate ourselves about domestic violence and to say, “No more.”

 

NO MORE logo

The signature blue “vanishing point” in the NO MORE campaign logo evolved from the concept of zero, as in zero incidences of domestic violence and sexual assault.

 

Like NO MORE, a national public awareness and engagement campaign focused on ending domestic violence and sexual assault, we must do all we can to end domestic violence. NO MORE ran a spot during Sunday afternoon’s Minnesota Vikings-Chicago Bears football game. That outreach to football fans was good to see.

 

NO MORE logo

 

 

No more. Strong words. Let’s speak them, believe them, practice them.

If you witness a case of domestic abuse, whether verbal or physical or both, call the cops. In the case of the 28-year-old Faribault man, officers were responding “to a report of a woman being grabbed by a man outside a home,” according to the newspaper article.

 

NO MORE logo

 

Someone saw. Someone called. Someone decided, no more.

© Copyright 2014 Audrey Kletscher Helbling